F8 by Five Finger Death Punch Review


Five Finger Death Punch remains a garbage tier modern metal band: horrendously generic instrumentals are topped off with cringe-inducing lyrics that sound like they come straight from a 13-year-old who thinks that Slipknot is the epitome of heavy music (e.g. me, 13 years ago). Also, is the album supposed to be pronounced “fate”? Because if so, that is fucking hilarious.

Alright, so let’s check some lyrics out:

“I’m a little bit off today
Something down inside me feels so different
Just a little bit off today
You can all fuck off today”

HAHAHAHAH, WHAT?!?! And just listen to the way he sings that last line. So. fucking. bad.

Or what about these lyrics:

“Can I be, can I be one of the cool kids? (You’re the dumbshits)
All I ever wanted to be is one of the brightest motherfucking falling stars
Can I be, can I be one of your heroes? (Zeroes)
Can somebody tell me
Am I the top of the bottom
Or the bottom of the top?”

WOW, SO COOL! I CAN’T BELIEVE THESE 45 YEAR OLD GUYS ARE STICKING IT TO THE COOL KIDS. BY THE WAY, YOUR HEROES ARE ZEROES… L’EPIQUE FTW XDDDDDDD

Or how about these lyrics:

“(I see you)
You’re the one that’s in all of the movies, on everyone’s TV
(Such a farce)
You’re convinced that your shit doesn’t stink and we all should adore you”

HOLLYWOOD SUCKS, RIGHT BOYS??!?!?!! HAHAHAHAHA SO FAKE. FAKE LIFESTYLES. IT’S ALL FAKE BULLSHIT AHHAHAHAHAHA.

Five Finger Death Punch tries “sticking it to the man” but it just comes off as cringey self-righteousness. Kind of like this review.

1/10 – Atrocious

2 thoughts on “F8 by Five Finger Death Punch Review

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